Keep writing and I’ll keep reading.«12345» Keep writing and I’ll keep reading.«12345» I think I should have only changed POV’s a couple of times there. Top marks from me! Free porn lol
horny-I think maintaining a rotation through the characters is a good idea and ID’ing each POV change would probabily been the biggest improvement. 22 comments«12345»anonymous readerReport 2011-03-20 08:22:23RpB/M: WTF! The breaks with ID could help, maintain the rotation through the characters. WGF- That’s exactly the problem I had on the forum and overcorrected for here. Cija-The story evolved like a shack turning into a mansion, my biggest regret was not making the POV changes read clearly. Damn the consequences and space each paragraph as much as you want.
